Adventurous Men

Four solid blood sacrifices from us here in The Void.

I spent half of this book laughing my ass off and the other half feeling utterly validated. I may not have connected to every word--I certainly do not like football as much as T Cooper--however, the heart was there at the core of this book.

To say this once and not nine fucking times: This is a memoir about T Cooper--writer, father, husband, sports fan, and Trans-man.

Ultimately, as the title suggests, these are the real adventures of a man. Cooper not only relates his own experiences, but the accounts of others via interviews with other transgender men, their spouses, siblings, coworkers, and parents. The result is a funny, truthful, enlightening, and heart string tugging read for everyone.

Perhaps the moments with the most impact were those of vulnerability. Where Cooper's true fears, doubts, and insecurities were detailed--in these we are able to find companionship with the author. What I think most helped this book was how Cooper was truthful: to himself, about himself, to the audience, and about his ideas. He relates his world as he sees it and asks others about their perspectives.

Whatever deep moments arise are off set with humorous lines such as:

• The guy in the gym wearing too tight spandex shorts

• That fucked up horse painting

• Anything at all about Tyrone Cooper

• I'd tell you more but then it'll spoil and the read.

I highly recommend this book (and will definitely shove it into other people's faces so they can see what I feel).

--

I'd like to take a moment to relate what this book provided me on a personal level as a young trans- man.

Validity and something as an emotional companion guide. It showed me my own fears and current travels and struggles. It gave me words to relate to my own relatives (which is why I appreciate the interviews with family members). It gave me what I didn't know was lacking.

Let me explain.

The interviews provided questions I am too afraid to ask my own family. These answers better help me to see their possible views and struggles in all of this.

What I didn't know I was lacking was knowledge of the extent of hate-crimes against trans-gendered men. This may be confusing, but I needed that. I have my own abstract fears. I knew in a vague, abstract way that it happens. However, due to lack of representation and awareness, I was under the impression that others had it worse. That it was only Trans-women that got assaulted--because most representation and advocacy is focused in that direction. Not saying that that should be any less, but where are the people like me? Where are the men like me? (Other than Mulan, Ouran High School Host Club, She's the Man, and any other gender-bending show. Not that any of those shows actually incorporate this topic but, eh, close enough.)

It's weird to think that knowledge and mental picture of brutality can bring comfort. However, I've been telling myself that my fears are unfounded. No one cares if a female born person dresses as a man. There are others who have it worse. It also wasn't just my involved in this thought process. I have a friend who is going through something similar, but in reverse. All the time they say, "It's not the same." that the consequences are so much more severe. It's belittling and it shuts down the conversation wherein I need to confess my fears.

Now, I have something to stand on.

Thank you, T Cooper, your wife was right.

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Fare Thee Well

Mac Abre